Friend Blog....

So I was once told that like most produce and fresh foods, friends sometimes come with expiration dates. I thought this ludicrous at first, but after my 28 years of living, I think this might be true... People come and people go, then people pop right back up again, but I truly believe they were brought into your life for a reason.

I just feel lately that I'm very disconnected with some of my friends. Ones that live far away and just around the corner. I feel like I'm losing grip on who my close friends are and if it's worth the effort.

I just feel like there is not enough time in the day to keep in contact with everyone I would like to keep in contact with, and even when you have really close friendships with someone, it just seems like over time, they can dwindle and even when you do talk to them, there seems to be not much to say, even though the world around yourself is changing.

I try to do my part... keep up with phone calls, facebook, email, even try to make dinner dates. Is it bad that I take it as a personal affront that some of my friends cancel on me.... again and again. Is it something is their or my conscience saying that our expiration date has or is about to arrive.

Sometimes I just want to give up on certain people, even though we have a history together. But it's hard trying to keep up with everyone's lives when it feels like they don't want to keep up with yours...

Hmmm.... food for thought.....

A Real Pain in the Ass... no pun intended....

Ok, so first and foremost, I would like to state that Mr. Hero is the devil.  Not really, because it is magically delicious, but because it also gave me explosive diarrhea. 

"Why the hell do we need to know that, Jimmie?"  Well good question... Because it is has been the center of my life for almost two weeks now!  Two Thursdays ago I thought it would be a grand idea to get Mr. Hero for lunch.  It was delicious, with their yummy waffle fries and the yummy cheese...  But it got me sick... very sick.  Sick enough to have such bad shits that I ripped me bum.  Thats right kids, Little Jimmie has a broken butthole!  I like to call it FB, short for flaming butthole.  And what NOT perfect timing.  I finally have a boyfriend that I can do dirty things with, but no, I'm broken!  (Thank God he is not only using me for my body, or I would be fucked... or not.... ) Thankfully he enjoys me for my intellectual mind and my witty banter!  

But though painful as this is (and I mean I pray to Baby Jesus every night for this nightmare to end... because seriously, I would not wish this upon my worst enemy!)  it is a little humorous.  I tend to be the butt of everyones jokes now.... literally!  Now I truly am a pain in the ass!  It got so bad I had to see a doctor and she had to put her finger up my butt.  I told her that usually someone buys me dinner before I let them do that.  Oh my, will the amusement never end!  

So in closing.  My words from the wise would be:  Careful what you eat, especially Mr. Hero, for though they may satisfy your loins for a brief moment... moments later they may tear open your asshole!  

And for those of you asking whether it was sex that did this  (Thank God after two years I finally got laid) the answer is no.  This happened at a later date and time from the "celestial awaking of the loinal gods." 

For real kids, I really am gay.. I do date guys!

Ok,  So I have had quite a few people wondering about my date(s).  So I thought, hello, I have technology, let me blog about it!  I know it has been a while, but Jimmie is busy and has had no social life till recently.

OK!  So here it goes.  Dr. Dick (and yes he is totally ok me/us calling him that!) texted me two Sundays ago.  We went out last Wed night and last Sunday.  Here is the scoop!!  The dates went GREAT!  I am still kind of in shock that there are smart, educated, witty gay men out there... I'm not alone... heyo!

We went to dinner both nights and talked... and talked and talked..  It was great!  His name is Dr. Richard Cowen and is a pediatric psychologist.  He teaches at Kent State, is part owner of a practice and is smart and a great conversationalist.  This one might be a keeper kids.  

So, we have the next few dates planned out, including Valentine's day.  Now, we both made it clear that we are not doing anything big, especially because we just started to see each other and do NOT want to rush into anything.  But I do have to say, this is the first time in like three years I have a date, I mean a real date, other than Jen.... though I love her, but she has a vagina, and we all know how I feel about those! So yes, I am quite excited to see where this goes. Though I do not want to jinx myself.  But Yay!!!

Things are going slow and we are not being very gay about things, and when I say gay, I mean we are not twinks trying to get our groove thang on.  He has been a gentleman, but even more amazing, so have I! :)  

So, needless to say, thank you everyone for being interested in this.  I know I don't date much and it is kinda nice to have something good to talk about.  I'm praying it keeps getting better!

All I want for Christmas is NOT my two front teeth, just a root canal!

So as of yet, December has been the costliest month to me this year, and possibly the past few years.  For some reason my money just seems to keep disappearing and my credit card is getting a very undeserved work out! 

So I was having dental problems and went in to get them checked.  I have tooth decay, about six cavities and I need a root canal and crown.  Oh, and I just saw my dentist 5 months ago... Obviously he missed something.  

So today I forked out half a grand to get my pearly whites back in shape and still need a root canal.  I wish I could have said that I don't brush or something for why I deserve this, but no.  I brush. I floss semi regularly.  I drink lots of water and cut back my sugar intake, but no.  I have about few grand worth of improvement to be done.  Thank God for dental insurance... hopefully it will cover some!

OK, I'm not bitching about my beautiful teeth.  Now let's talk about Christmas.  This is the season of love... and that's a great thing, because that is all I'm giving away this Christmas.  That and lap dances!  Get in line, kids!

Grrr and Yay!!!

Ok folks, lets start with the Grr....  (This is my forewarning that the following may sound crazy and only I or other losers like myself will really get it!)  So the new trailer for the new Star Trek movie finally came out!  And I'm a little outraged by it!  It doesn't show much, but it shows like a galaxy traveling, alien bashing action flick.  Ok, thank you JJ Abrams for trying to bring the genre back, but it's like he mashed it up in the process. 

First of all, the first scene of the trailer, they have a young kirk driving a car off a cliff trying to be a bad ass punk.  Really?  Really?!?!  James Kirk, a punk?  That's like saying Edgar Allen Poe wrote porn!  At least Abrams had the smarts not to fuck with the Enterprise.  Though it's not the same as the original, it's still has the Constitution Class resemblance of the large saucer section, warp nacelles and star drive section!  Look at it... it looks almost too cool...  

They kept the uniforms the same, but that's not saying much!  I guess he is trying to bring a bigger audience to Star Trek, which I understand.  He at least has all the original characters in there, but for us Trekkers that have loved the show for years, it's like messing with history.  I will have to watch the movie (coming out May 8 of 2009) to have my full opinion on it...

Now for the Yay!!  So randomly at work today, Jenilee called me and told me she had an extra ticket for Legally Blond the Musical in Cleveland and asked if I wanted to go.  So I left work early and went and LOVED it!  It was such a fun show.  It is like a modern Hairspray!  So that made me happy and made me forget about the Star Trek debacle for a little while...

Now I am off to bed... 

I can't breath dammit!

So this is like day 7 of my cold from hell.  I just read an article my dad cut out of the paper that says it might be a flu.  According to Dr. G, I got the aids... thanks Dr, thanks for mocking my non existent sex life!  Its hard to get a fricken STD when there is no S in the first place.

But I am finally feeling better!  I can kinda breath through my nose and my aches and pains are going away.  It's kinda a good diet... I don't want to eat anything!   

So I had this great idea in the shower  (by the way, I get many great ideas in the shower, it's kind of like my thinking cap, but larger and wetter....wait, that sounded dirty....;)  )  Anyways, I decided that I should write a book.  I know, genius, right!!!!  I always have so many quirky story lines and weird characters that I should write a book.  Plus I really like to write... hence my new blog.  So, I am going to start a book soon and I hope you publish it.  You heard it here first folks....  my short awaited novel!

Ok, I'm off to bed.... I will update my lovely blog about my book... but for now... nighty night moon!

Vote for Jimmie!

So I guess I have a little campaign going on at the Sear's Optical in Medina! They have pins that say vote for Jimmy!! (True, they are for Jimmy John's subs, but it's still my name!) So I guess that means I am running for president! Sweet!

So if I were pres, what would I do? Well, I would make my minions love me by allowing gay marriage! LOL, ok maybe not, but I would get rid of taxes and sleep with lots of people! That should make everyone happy... hello, have you seen me? I'm way sexxy! That should make anyone happy!

Then I would give everyone a million bucks so everyone would stop whining about how broke they are. Then I would make my "Jimmie Government" CEO of exxon mobile so we could all drive a lot!

Ice cream makes people happy, maybe I would make a monthly ice cream social where we all eat ice cream... but then we would be the fattest country in the world... oh wait... we are! Snaps!

Oh, if only Jimmie were pres for a day....